I'm beginning 2017 pretending to be someone I'm not. Each and every morning that I get woken up...scratch that. I don't get woken up because in fact I haven't slept more than an hour for weeks!!!!
I'm drained, keeping a smile on my face (although my husband may say the opposite) and I hold myself together for my family. Inside I'm just screaming, I want to curl up in bed for months! I guess this is all just sleep deprivation right?
I feel terrible that I can't just enjoy these moments but on one arm I've got an over tired baby that won't sleep who is resulting to screaming his days by and on the other I am dragging along a toddler who has decided to have a complete mental break down outside Mothercare
because there was chewing gum on the fricken floor. What even is that?!
My dear husband may remember me calling him cute names like 'babe' and 'sweetheart'. Now all he gets is a massive SHHH!!!! When he enters a room. I am bored of saying SHHH 1000 times a day for it to just be ignored! I even got angry at my husband for farting in his sleep the other night (in my defence he did wake the fricken baby! - tell me that's not normal!) I look forward to my husband being my husband and being able to truly enjoy my children, we are getting there, slowly!
This truly is one of the most testing times for a marriage, or at least mine. I am not the woman he first met but I guess (I hope) he falls in love with every woman I become during my lifetime. The free single woman he first met, the explorer woman when we travelled, the wife I soon became and now the mother I try my very best to be. I know we are strong but this phase in my life especially is such a blur.
Anyway, that's way too soppy for me. Motherhood sucks, why did I ever do this?! That's better, that's how I really feel right now ;)
Oh and can people stop going around telling everyone to have their children close together. IT IS NOT FUN!!!!! (Yet) Anyway, I better go. I have to upload another cute happy photo of my family to Facebook ;)
Good luck & Peace ✌🏼